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Newsletter Archive (and Index!) Available
Access past issues of The School
Mediator, as
well as our new index by topic, through the
link
below.
The School Mediator Archive
The
School Mediator's Field Guide:
Prejudice, Sexual Harassment,
Large Groups and Other Daily Challenges
by
Richard Cohen
more
info |
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Students
Resolving Conflict:
Peer Mediation in Schools
by
Richard Cohen
more
info |
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Welcome to the September issue of
The School
Mediator.
This issue is posted in celebration and gratitude
for the hard work of peer mediation coordinators everywhere.
Please send along your thoughts and
experiences. It is always a pleasure to hear from you.
Wishing you the best, wherever you are,
Richard Cohen
Founder and Director
School Mediation Associates
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| A Parade for Peer Mediation Coordinators | | |
A few weeks ago I learned that a peer mediation
coordinator
whom I greatly respect, I'll call him Constantine, lost
his job.
A model educator and all around great guy,
Constantine
possesses the qualities I have admired in many peer
mediation
coordinators: "off-the-charts" interpersonal
intelligence, the
ability to build caring relationships with adults and
young
people
quickly, hardworking, compassionate and politically savvy.
His peer mediation program met my definition of a "peak performing"
mediation program. Hundreds of students were
trained as
mediators during his
tenure, and thousands participated in mediation
sessions.
Because the circumstance of his leaving were difficult,
Constantine did not receive the send off that he
deserved.
His dedication and service warranted a farewell banquet;
he
barely
got a thank you.
After my initial shock and disappointment subsided, I
began
to
wonder: Did educators at his school appreciate what
a
positive
impact Constantine had on their students?
Clearly the answer was no.
The reason, I think, is partly this: Peer mediation
coordinators
are relatively invisible.
Consider:
Peer Mediation Coordinator positions are
generally not on
the
books
Though some coordinators hold full or part-time
positions,
the
overwhelming majority--90% or more--are teachers or
counselors first, peer mediation coordinators
second. They
might receive a stipend, they even might be assigned
one
less
class to teach, but they coordinate the program in
addition to
their regularly scheduled job. Significantly, their
responsibilities
as coordinator are not part of their official job
description, they
are not evaluated on their peer mediation work,
and
their
compensation, if they receive any, does not
come
from the
regular school budget.
Peer Mediation Coordination is largely a
facilitative role
Coordinators help students help each other. They
arrange
the
logistics, and then stand back while young people do
the
glory
work. More the manager behind the scenes than the
lead
singer in the band, coordinators are often not
recognized for
their contribution. (Despite this, many coordinators
exhibit a
humbleness and selflessness that would look good on
any
educator: it is not about them, it is about their
students.)
Peer Mediation Coordinators' work is
confidential
Coordinators are forbidden from discussing a large
portion of
their work with anyone else in their buildings. This
only
serves
to
increase their invisibility.
Though they have an impact upon students as powerful as
anyone
in
their buildings, peer mediation coordinators' work falls
in the
cracks, hidden from the view of many of their
colleagues.
Is this a problem? I think so, and perhaps in a future
issue
we
can discuss how to address this challenge.
But for now, and inspired by Constantine's departure, I
want
to
start this year by celebrating the
accomplishments of
peer
mediation coordinators everywhere.
In fact, I have organized a virtual parade. Throngs are
on
either side of the street composed of all the students
you
have
ever trained as mediators, all the young people and
adults
who
have participating in mediation sessions, and many
others--
peers, teachers, parents, siblings, community
members--who, though one or two degrees removed from mediators
and
parties,
have also benefited from your work.
All you have to do is stroll down the street.
The crowd is shouting your name, giving you high
fives,
throwing flowers...
They have all come out to say one thing to you:
Thank you!
Your
thoughts...?
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| Response to "Letting Things Be Wrong" | | |
We received a number of responses to
the
last issue
of The School Mediator. They follow below...
I find your thoughts very much on target.
Mediation is not a mechanical process based only on
knowledge and the mastery of skills; it is very much
intertwined with our life experiences. Our personal
growth
and professional development always present
opportunities
for new depth and breadth of understanding of the
mediation process.
We may be going in the same direction, but not on the
same
path, or at the same pace.
Luis Borri, Chaplain
School of Law
Inter American University
San Juan, Puerto Rico
Your most recent article are the words of a well
seasoned
mediator.
Ultimately, it is up to the participants to find their own
solutions. If they don't within the time span of their
mediation, the process of a well-run, respectful
mediation
begins to carve a path for them which may help them
find a
solution in the future.
Much of our work is planting seeds; sometimes we get
to
see what comes up...sometimes we can only wait and
hope.
Thanks for the reminder and for the support for our
work.
Ellie Dendahl, Coordinator
School Mediation Program
Santa Fe Public Schools
Santa Fe, New Mexico
Thank you for this issue. I especially liked your
closing,
"Work hard, create a space for peace, and hope for the
best." I may add that phrase to my training.
I often remind myself and those I train that "it's not our
lives"
that we're talking about.
I explain to parties too that I am definitely not "the
decider;"
that it's not about me. Parties find it reassuring to
know that
ultimately they are in charge, and it is an easy way to
talk
about self-determination.
Carol Stewart, Program Director
NH Mediation Program
Concord, New Hampshire
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